MARKETING JOKES, OFFICIAL JOKES,

MARKETING JOKES, MARKETING AND OFFICIAL JOKES, ONLINE MARKETING JOKES, OFFICIAL JOKES; JOKES OF MARKETING; MARKETING EXECUTIVE JOKES; MARKETING MANAGER JOKES; MARKETING AND JOKES; MARKETING; 

Third Way :-) -----
---The Optimist says, "The glass is half full."

---The Pessimist says, "The glass is half empty."

---The Marketing Consultant says, "Your glass needs re-sizing."

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Try This
While sitting at your desk, make clockwise circles with your right foot. While doing this, draw the number "6" in the air with your right hand. What direction is your foot going now?
Marketing moral: Focus, focus, focus!
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
You might be a marketer if... ...you refer to dating as test marketing.
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
LET's SHIP IT (Marketing Manager) :
A Software Manager - A Hardware Manager - and a Marketing Managers are driving to a meeting, when a tire blows.  The get out of the car and look at the problem :
The Software Manager says :--- "I can't do anything about this - it's a hardware problem
The Hardware Manager says :--- "Maybe if we turned the car off and on again, it would fix itself". The Marketing Manager says :--- "Hey, 75% f it is working - let's ship it!"
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

You go to a party and you see an attractive girl across the room. You go up to her and say, "Hi, I'm great in bed, how about it?"
That's Direct Marketing. 
You go to a party and you see an attractive girl across the room. You give your friend a buck. She goes up and says "Hi, my friend over there is great in bed, how about it?"
That's Advertising.
You go to a party and see an attractive girl across the room. You somehow get her mobile number. You call and chat her up a while and then say "Hi, I am great in bed, how about it?"
That's Tele-Marketing.
You go to a party and see an attractive girl across the room. You recognize her. You walk up to her, refresh her memory and get her to laugh and giggle and then suggest, "Hi, I am great in bed, how about it?"
That's Customer Relationship Management.
You go to a party and you see an attractive girl across the room. You stand straight, you talk soft and smooth, you open the door for the ladies, you smile like a dream, you set an aura around you playing the Mr. Gentleman and then you move up to the girl and say, "Hi, I am great in bed, how about it?"
That's Hard Selling.
You go to a party, you see an attractive girl across the room. SHE COMES OVER and says, "Hi, I hear you're great in bed, how about it?"

Now THAT is the power of Branding. 

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Marketing Two-Upmanship : 

A retailer was dismayed when a competitor selling the same type of product opened next-door to him, displaying a large sign proclaiming "Best Deals".

Not long after he was horrified to find yet another competitor move in next-door, on the other side if his store. It's large sign was even more disturbing- "Lowest Prices".

After his initial panic, and concern that he would be driven out of business, he looked for a way to turn the situation to his marketing advantage. Finally, an idea came to him. Next day, he proudly unveiled a new and huge sign over his front door. It read,

"Main Entrance"!

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx